It’s fashion week season again. Last week was New York, this week it’s London; Milan & Paris soon to follow. This means that I’m spending a lot of time on my iPhone looking at the shows on my Style.com app. I’m also on refinery29.com looking at slideshows of all the outfits that editors & spectators are wearing to the shows.

All this oogling & oggling will inevitably lead to a few things:

1. I have discovered even more shoes that I want.

Last time I counted up my pairs of shoes, I had 55. I’ve bought a few pairs since then, so now I’m somewhere around 60. I don’t need anymore shoes. In fact, I need to get rid of some. But this creates separation anxiety on my part & I just can’t bear to do it.

2. I learn of the new trends, and SURPRISE!, I have to buy some more items to work them.

This is pretty much gonna go like the shoe scenario. I have 2 closets, one dedicated strictly for bottoms & one for tops. The bars in both are bowing. I don’t need anymore clothes. I need to edit. But the anxiety - can’t be done.

3. I develop body dysmorphia & feel that I must immediately drop 10 lbs.

This is what happens when you stare at 6ft 20lb models for hours on end each day. Although, this isn’t so bad this year because I started working out in January & have already tightened up to some degree. I’ve also started to notice that some of these women have freakish shoulders that look like curtain rods. But I do want a flat tummy - not washboard abs (I think that looks gross on women), just a slim tummy.

But I don’t have the time or money for any of this. I’m in lawschool and living on student loans. I can’t afford anything. Everything I have bought for myself in the past 2 years is not paid for & is sitting in my closet accruing interest. I make it to the gym an average of 3 days a week - sometimes I can do 4, sometimes I can only do 2. Including driving time, it’s an hour and a half out of my day. That doesn’t seem like a lot, but I can read upwards of 40 pgs in that time or wash my car, both of which need to be done at some point.

Fashion week makes me feel poor & fat - yet I love it. Look forward to it 2 times out of every year.